Stop Aiming for the Peak—Train for the Climb Instead
How measuring yourself by someone else’s success will sabotage your own
Hello! Before we dive in, this is a free publication. If you enjoy it, please support it through a subscription, a restack, or a recommendation.
My Medium friends can read this story there as well.
Many of us fail to reach our goals not because we’re unmotivated, but because we’re measuring ourselves against the wrong goal. We compare our progress to someone else’s success, aim for the summit before we’ve trained for the climb, and quietly wonder why we’re exhausted, discouraged, or lost.
The truth? Real success—especially in solopreneurship and nonprofit work, which both tend to be lonely—is slow, quiet, and intentional. If you’ve felt like you’re drifting, maybe you are. But here’s the better news: drift isn’t your destiny. Clarity is still possible.
I’ve seen this play out across every sector I’ve been a leader in, finance, higher education, and now humanitarian aid. Over and over again, people start with vision, skill, and deep potential. But when success doesn’t come fast enough, they give up. They jump to the next opportunity, the next idea, the next “this might be it.” But that’s not strategy. That’s a lottery.
I was actually in the process of writing this when I saw a timely note on my feed from Tam Nguyen… and I couldn’t have said it any better…
When you define success for yourself, you avoid chasing someone else’s version of it.
I’m writing this to help you avoid that mistake, and to remind you that your slow, faithful work isn’t a sign you’re off track. It’s the evidence you’re in the right race. Don’t give up before seeing the fruit of your work.
My Favorite Metaphor
One of my favorite metaphors is that of a captain setting sail with a great ship, clear weather, and a destination in mind. But instead of steering, he lies down and trusts that he will DRIFT straight to his destination.
That’s ridiculous! No one drifts to success!
…but that’s how many of us approach goals.
We:
Hope momentum will carry us
Wait for motivation to appear
Trust that vision alone will keep us on course
AND we never set our own personal goals.
But drift never leads to your destination. Oceans don’t work that way. And neither does success.
The strongest leaders I’ve known didn’t coast their way to their peaks. They:
Set small achievable goals (not used someone else’s)
Adjusted direction often
Stayed committed to the process, not just the result
Failed, and learned from those mistakes
Took time…
Why Most Goals Fail
Most goals don’t fail because we’re lazy. They fail because they’re modeled on someone else’s life.
We compare:
Our first draft to their finished product
Our start to their breakthrough
Our honest process to their curated post
But behind every summit is a story of sacrifice.
Most people overestimate what they can do in one year and underestimate what they can do in ten.
Bill Gates
Success isn’t a leap. It’s a long, quiet climb.
By the time you see the picture of the climber at the peak of Everest, the work has been done, years of training, studying, equipping, but you don’t see that. We look at his or her success and make that our goal, but we hope to skip their process.
We look at 1000 paid subscribers and want to get there with next week’s post.
We see screenshots of $5,000 monthly on Medium and get frustrated when we don’t reach it in our first 20 posts.
Instead of aiming at the outcome, aim at the formation.
A Better Model:
Define Your What → What exactly are you building this season?
Clarify Your Why → Why does it matter when it gets hard?
Name Your Next Step → Not your five-year plan. Your next honest move.
Substack Success
I’ve taken some time to study the notes from successful Substack creators, those who we are tempted, as we launch, to see their numbers, and make them our measure of success, but do so without seeing the work they took to get there. Invariably, I found that each creator has a note reminding their audience how long it took to get where they are… it takes humble grind.
Derek Hughes , Yana G.Y. , Landon Poburan , Claudia Faith , Benjamin Antoine , they all took time. Study their methods, learn from them, follow them, they all work to help you grow, BUT understand that what looks like “overnight success” is always a product of unseen years of work. They go hand in hand.
Don’t make someone else’s success your measure of success, and don’t give up before seeing things pay off!
💬 TL;DR — If You Only Remember This
Drift never leads to destination—grab the wheel.
Most goals fail because they’re based on someone else’s story.
Set your what, clarify your why, walk your next step.
Real success is slow and strategic, not flashy.
Please add to the conversation, what is the first thing you think of after reading this?
PS: Enjoy this? You can buy me a coffee here and support future free content like this one.
This is a great post Joel—thank you 🙏
Joel, this is so true. Few people can understand what it takes to get there, and even fewer can actually do it.